- Tessera -

 Site Administrator


We're Back..!

Full Site Is
Back Online

After a nearly two-year absence, our full web site is back online, with plenty of features to entertain you.




Current News

The True Patch
Gold Edition:
Direct Downloads

The best VTMB patch on the web is now available directly from our private server. Please visit our Forums for further details.




Bullshit Meter

Destroy Corporate

Tired of being bullied, exploited and victimized by the super-rich..? Sick of watching decent, normal folks losing their homes... whilst greedy bankers and the criminals on Wall Street continue to run amok..? Then join "the 99%" by supporting progressive grassroots organizations and "Occupy" movements within your vicinity. Remember -- you can't be free if someone else owns you. Think about it.


VTMB Mega-Mod (sample)
Animated nude poster of Jeanette


Latest News

May 01, 2013

Tessera's "VTMB Mega-Mod" is no longer available to the public... due to a
blatant and ongoing incident of theft (chiefly by members of the Camarilla Edition web site).
 A full explanation of Tessera's decision to permanently withdraw the VTMB Mega-Mod can be found here.

Screenshot Of The Month

ABOVE:  Zoey's twin sister Cloey, from Left 4 Dead. A mod-in-progress by Tessera.

This character will be a replacement for the default character of Louis.

Tired Of The Pre-Paid "Payola" Reviews That You See On Every Single Commercial
Gaming Site..?  Then Here Are Tessera's Latest "Short And Sweet" Game Reviews:

  • Dragon Age 2: it's an obvious rush job... an attempt to cash in quick on a franchise that
    was pretty weak to begin with. Avoid this game... it's just more formulaic garbage which
    was obviously designed to suck in the fanboys and steal their money. Pure swill.
  • TES: Skyrim: nearly un-playable on a PC, this crappy console-to-PC port doesn't even
    look as good as its predecessor Oblivion did SIX YEARS AGO. The engine is the same
    as the one used for Fallout 3... which means that it's ugly and wonky as hell. Total crap,
    that only the most rabid fanboys could possibly love. Everyone else should avoid Skyrim,
    or else try to get yourself a free copy from TPB if you are THAT determined to play it.
  • Civilization 5: is without a doubt the weakest entry into the Civilization franchise.
    Gameplay is tedious and repetitive. Diplomacy is downright worthless. Your rivals
    regularly behave like psychotics, thanks to the sloppily written AI. It's graphics engine
    crashes constantly, even after being patched. TIP: turn off your anti-aliasing before you
    launch this buggy and irresponsibly produced game. It's the best way to keep it from
    glitching out. Why people pay money for garbage like this I will never understand.
    Especially when The Pirate Bay (TPB) exists... know what I mean..? I thought so.
  • World Of Warcraft: what started out as a fairly decent MMO in 2004 has since devolved
    into a horribly cheap and vapid game for babies. Ever since ActiVision took over Blizzard,
    everything has been going straight into the shitter. The most recent expansion for WoW
    has totally undermined everything that was decent about that game... leaving us with
    nothing but weak content, a ruined game world, and a bunch of overpowered gear for
    WoW's dominant community of "gimmee! gimmee! gimmee! now! now! now!" children.
    The good news is that there are plenty of PRIVATE WoW servers out there, and most
    of them have removed a lot of the later kiddie-kontent and restored WoW to its earlier,
    less childish incarnation. So if you wanna play WoW these days, then my advice is to
    look around for a good emulated server... and stop giving Blizzard your money.
  • Age Of Conan: I had high hopes for this game, back when it was still in its beta phase.
    But after its release, Funcom decided to sabotage any attempts at fan-made mods which,
    in turn, angered the community so severely that a huge number of AoC's original players
    quit the game altogether and canceled their subs. Funcom is so desperate to keep this
    overly-censored bore-fest afloat, that they've been offering people free gameplay deals
    for the past two years. Do yourselves a favor... and just tell Funcom to go blow goats.
    Best way to describe AoC: it's like playing WoW, with tits. Don't waste your time.
  • Vampire -- The Masquerade: Bloodlines: still one of my top five favorite PC-RPG's
    of all time... and for very good reason: it's a mature game, designed for intelligent
    and imaginative players. Although released in a hopelessly buggy state, the existence
    of the True Patch Gold Edition has eliminated all of those problems once and for all,
    and without making any arbitrary and unnecessary changes to the quests, the items,
    or the gameplay mechanics. And if you also install my adults-only VTMB Mega-Mod,
    then the entertainment and replay-ability factors rise even higher. VTMB is definitely
    very high on my list of recommended RPG's. Once it has been properly patched with
    the True Patch Gold Edition, it's a real gem of a game and guaranteed to please just
    about everyone whose IQ is bigger than their shoe size. For mature players only.

Join Our Forums..!!!
NOTE: You must add your correct age and gender to your Forum profile, immediately after joining!

The tessmage.com Forums are open to all adults who are looking for a 100% uncensored
environment in which to play. We talk about everything on our board... not just games.
You'll find literally thousands of subjects -- on everything from gaming, current events,

politics, humor, sex and romance, and just about every politically INCORRECT theme

that you can imagine.  And of course, you'll also find tons of information and images

regarding Tessera's mods, the True Patch, original works of art, technical subjects,
various tips and tricks, fan fiction... you name it, and it's probably in there somewhere.
Note that the majority of our Forums are invisible to unregistered guests. But once

you join us, the rest of our board will magically open up to you.  Give it a try..!!!