Melania's Ugly, Fake Tits

[Tessera]

Melania's Ugly Fake Tits




You may be wondering why I'm posting this topic. 

Well, it's because I believe that Melania Trump's ugly, plastic tits may be a threat to our national security. I'll explain in a bit.

First, the above photo is not a fake. Sure, I added a few red arrows here and there -- more on that in a moment. But this is a 100% genuine photo, taken back in the days when Melania was just another nude model and Slovenian Bimbo-For-Sale. Looking closely at her, I think we can deduce that Donald Trump (a notorious cheapskate) must have bought Melania from the Balkan Bimbo Bargain Bin. Seriously... her tits look HORRIBLE.

I don't think I've ever seen a more botched looking boob job... and I've seen plenty. They look as if some drunken east European surgeon inserted her implants with a grapefruit spoon, and then used a ball-peen hammer to smooth out the imperfections. I added the red arrows to indicate the more obvious problem areas, because they're a bit tough to see clearly in this grainy old photo. But just look closely. We see dimples, wrinkles, and outright dents in her flesh. Her small nipples are so off-center, that they look as if they were glued on as an afterthought, by a blind man.

Absolutely nothing is right about those horrific tits and frankly, they look dangerously unstable to me. This is why I am concerned about our national security. Who knows what cheap, potentially volatile materials they used, when they reupholstered Melania's chest..? This slut could go through a metal detector at the airport, and the x-rays could cause her tits to violently explode, for all we know. Dozens of people could be killed. Small children could be scarred for life. Who knows what else those freakish things might be capable of..? Would you feel safe, standing near a gruesome pair of robo-tits like hers..?

OH MY GOD... GET BACK... she's gonna BLOOOOOW..!!!   

I propose that Melania's tits be immediately deported, in the interest of national safety. The rest of her can stay, I suppose -- just so long as she minds her place, when we lock her sick husband in prison.

[Tessera]

EPIC BURN of the MONTH

Dave Rubin, who... so far as I can tell... is just another right-wing sellout, who uses his homosexuality as a shield against personal attacks (calling everyone who attacks him for ANY reason a "homophobe"), seems to have gotten his withered balls kicked HARD by none other than Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. This took place a couple of days ago.

Basically, Rubin tried to attack AOC on Twitter and so, she responded.

First, here is Dave Rubin's initial Twitter attack against AOC:



Not even remotely clever. And here was AOC's very classy response:



"...someone must have mistaken you for a journalist." ROFLMAO..!!!! 

Nicely done, AOC. Notice that her response garnered 122,000 likes on Twitter.

BURN..!!!

[Tessera]

Trump has been taken to the hospital, for an unscheduled medical exam.

His press people are calling it "the first stage of a multi-stage medical checkup." Uh huh... sure. What does that even mean..?

My opinion..? Trump has finally cracked under the pressure. He could be having an anxiety attack... or maybe heart palpitations... or he may even have suffered a full-blown nervous breakdown.

Let's see how long it is, before he appears in front of the cameras again. If it's more than two days, then you'll know something serious is going on with Trump's health.   

[Tessera]

After singing the National Anthem at Biden's inauguration, Lady Gaga proves that she has much nicer tits than Melania...




Not bad. Hey, at least they're real.

[Subcult]

Melina was the best that Trump's money could buy. 

He doesn't have a lot of buying power in that area.

[Tessera]

Another look at the former First Bimbo




Really ugly tits. Super obvious implants.